The Intervention
by the.old.amsterdams
Summary: OneShot: The crew decides to have an intervention. Of course, there's a little lesson for everyone. In celebration of Repeal Day 2007. When it's a lifestyle choice, no one has the right make it but you.


A/N: So my first publication on here. I have a few ideas and some stuff in the mix. This one was just a short story that I thought up today in honor of Repeal Day. For those of you who don't know, the Prohibition Amendment was repealed on December 5th, 1933. You're welcome to review or not, up to you. It's not really meant to be serious.

"Zoro, we wanted to talk to you about your problem," Luffy stated, his expression unusually serious. Zoro raised a curious eyebrow at his captain's demeanor, but said nothing. Luffy continued, "We have all become concerned about your drinking problem."

"Problem?"

"Yes," Nami replied, taking over for their captain. "It is clear that you have an addiction. The large amounts you drink, practically every day. The fact that it seems to never affect you-"

"You don't get drunk either," Zoro interrupted. He inwardly smirked at the point he made. He shifted and leaned back, placing his arms behind his head as if he had just won the argument.

"We're here to talk about you, Zoro, not me," Nami replied calmly. "Now you know you have a rather large debt to me and it just seems to keep growing-"

"So you want me to pay you back?"

"No," Nami sighed, her exasperation clear. "It's just that it's a problem if you are already in debt and yet continue to borrow more money to feed your habit."

"Nami-san's right, Marimo," Sanji said with a nod.

"What was that?" Zoro growled.

"Now, now, Kenshi-san, no need to get upset. We are simply trying to discuss our concerns."

"It's a matter of your health, Zoro," Chopper added.

"We are having an intervention!" Luffy stated proudly. "You have a problem and the first step to fixing the problem is to admit that you have one."

"But I still don't see how it's a problem. I drink when I want to because I enjoy it. I don't get drunk and I don't do anything-"

"What about what you did to all those people at Whisky Peak!"

"Oi Luffy, they _were_ bounty hunters," Usopp said, looking at the captain. Then turning to Zoro, he continued, "but that still doesn't change the fact that your drinking is a problem. Just accept it. Denial isn't befitting a man-"

"What?!"

Usopp shrank back at Zoro's outburst as the larger man sat forward, his face plastered with his typical scowl. At that moment, Luffy hopped up energetically and placed a hand on Zoro's shoulder. The swordsman's scowl retreating slightly, he looked up at the younger boy.

"Don't worry Zoro, we'll help you through this hard time!" Luffy declared, his abnormally large grin stretching across his face. "Okay everyone, no more alcohol on this ship!"

"NANI!?!?!"

Parties on the Going Merry were just not what they used to be. Even typical evening meals seemed to be lacking something. Zoro was significantly more grumpy than normal. Nami seemed to get annoyed at the slightest thing and Sanji was taking the brunt of it. Usopp had taken to keeping silent. Any attempt at telling a story or singing a song about the Great Captain Usopp would usually earn him a smack to the head. Luffy, though still as happy as ever, was not unaware of the change in his crew. He supposed they just needed a good adventure to liven things up.

"Shima! Shima da! Shima!" Luffy called out in excitement from his perch atop the ship's figurehead. "Oi mina! De tsui ta!"

Usopp and Chopper quickly clambered to the bow of the ship and took in the sight of the beautiful autumn island ahead. The trees were shades of red, orange, and yellow that blended together as the wind swept through the branches. The three younger crew members danced around together on the upper deck as the rest of the crew gathered.

"I wonder what sort of island this is," Nami said as she looked at the approaching piece of land.

"Probably full of big monsters or pirates looking for a fight," Zoro replied, grinning rather evilly as he brought his hand to rest on the hilt of his katana.

"Nani?! Monsters?! Pirates?!" Chopper, Usopp and Luffy cried out in unison, though Luffy looked rather excited at the idea while the other two... well...

"Oi oi, _we_ are pirates too, ya know," Sanji said before taking another drag on his cigarette. "Anyway, the shitty-swordsman is just hoping that will be the case. He just wants to have a fight."

As soon as the ship dropped anchor the crew, minus Robin who decided to stay and guard the ship, set off to explore the town they had seen on the other side of the cape. As the group neared the city they heard numerous voices. From the roar they could distinguish laughing, cheering, and singing. At the entrance to the city they looked up and saw a huge sign and they all paled. **Welcome to the Island of Sake!**

A man stood by the gate, a large stein in his hand and a blush across his face. "Ah! Welcome my good people!" he cried with a bit of a slur. "I take it you have come for the Whisky Festival!"

"Uh, not really-"

"Oh? Well if you came for the Beer Festival, unfortunately that ended yesterday. It will be about two weeks before we start the Rum Festival. If you didn't come for the whisky, I'm afraid you're out of luck." The man took a swig from his mug before continuing. "Of course, I wouldn't say out of luck myself! As mayor of this city, I encourage you to give our stocks a try. The Wesler distillery has a delightful batch of 10 year old malt. I am personally a fan of the rye from the Hixcomb distillery. It's the "Water of Life" as they say!"

The man continued to laugh and sip his drink as the pirate crew stared at him blankly. Slowly, everyone turned to face Zoro.

"What?" Zoro asked gruffly.

"We should, um, go back to the ship and wait. Excuse me, sir. How long does it take for the log to set here."

"Oh, I believe it takes a week. The time goes by pretty fast during the festivals, so most people don't pay it much mind."

"How long do these festivals last?"

"About every two weeks we start up a new festival. The island is full of distilleries, breweries and vineyards, plus we are one of the leading marketplaces for alcoholic beverages. We like to switch it up now and then to keep the party going."

"Going? You can't possibly mean..."

"Oh yes, it's a year-round party on the island."

"We _have_ to get out of this place," Nami hissed.

"Why is that, little lady?"

"Ah well, we can't drink alcohol anymore because Zoro had a drinking problem so we decided we shouldn't drink if he couldn't drink," Luffy explained with a grin.

"I _don't_ have a drinking problem!" Zoro snapped. "I drank socially!"

"Don't worry, you'll fit in here. Everyone on this island must have a drinking problem," Sanji stated. Zoro lashed out at Sanji and they began a little battle.

The mayor simply laughed heartily while shaking his head. The two men fighting stopped at looked the man. His booming laugh shook the ground around them as his rotund body bounced joyfully with his loud guffaws. Everyone stared at him silently until he stopped. "Oh no my good people, there is no drinking problem on this island. Sip We live by one rule here- Moderation. It's ok to drink as long as one does so with moderation. It's a matter of controlling oneself. We practice restraint here. Not everyone is drinking all day, every day. We simply enjoy our lives and take breaks now and then-"

"But you said these festivals are year round..."

"They are, but mostly for our guests. People come to this island to relax and enjoy themselves. The festivals are a means of business for the island, a time when we sell our products while also enjoying the company of friends. If you do not drink, you are still welcome to join in the festivities."

"And one drink never hurt anyone," Zoro stated. He turned to the group, a rather serious look on his face. "Did you guys every think for once I would do anything that would get in the way of my goal? I've put up with this ban on alcohol, but enough is enough. We're all adults here and we can make our own decisions. I'm going in to have a drink-"

"In moderation?" Luffy asked.

"Argh, of course in moderation! A swordsman never lets himself get caught with his guard down. You all should know this by now."

"I suppose," Nami stated thoughtfully. "This malt whisky is top quality, you say?"

The man nodded and bowed as the crew walked past and into the festival. They were surrounded by people laughing, singing, dancing, and generally having a nice romp. There were the sounds of glasses clinking and hands clapping.

"Okay everyone! LET'S PARTY!" Luffy cheered as he dove towards the closest food stand. As he shoved four pieces of meat into his mouth at once, the rest of the grew gathered round him with a deadly gleam in their eyes. He gulped down the food quickly. Scratching the back of his head, he laughed. "Ah, in moderation..."

**Happy Repeal Day everyone! Celebrate our freedom of choice with a nice dram or a cold one, but remember... Moderation. :)**


End file.
